Category Archives: hug

5 Reasons Your Siblings Are Your Best Friends

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45454_10200741088638316_355859828_nIt’s December 23, 1974.  A mother goes into labor and is rushed to the hospital by her husband.  Her due date was in the vicinity of the first week of January.  She was a bit nervous because she was a couple of weeks early.  The mother is rushed into the delivery room and the father sat in the waiting room with the other nail-biting, expecting fathers.  In those days Dads waited with everyone else in the waiting room.

The time comes to deliver the baby and out comes a crying baby girl with blonde hair.  Delivery nurses hustle about taking care of the baby while the doctor tends to the mother.  Suddenly, the doctor exclaims in a very surprised voice, “Nobody move!  She’s still too fat!  She’s having another baby”.  A nurse continues to work on the first baby and seven minutes later the chaos erupts again as a second baby girl, this one with brown hair, is born.  While baby #2 is being taken care of, a nurse goes to the waiting room door and holds up 2 fingers to the anxiously waiting father.  Being 1974, he says, “Yeah Peace.  But, how is my wife?” not realizing the nurse was signaling two babies, not the peace sign.  You see, back then sonograms did not exist; if they did they were not in tiny town hospitals.  This mom and dad were told they were to have one big baby boy the first week in January.  Two days before Christmas they were surprised with twin girls!  And, that’s the story of how I was brought into this fascinating world… I was surprise baby #2!

My twin sister and I also have a sister who is two and a half years older than us.  Although we all live states away from each other and could not be more different from one sister to the next, we are blood; we are sisters.  Even though at times it may not seem like it, we are best friends.  The old saying says you can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your family.  To me, family is the most important part of life.  Every family has their issues no matter how polished they look from the outside.  My sisters and I come from an incredibly large extended family.  And, with that, comes issues.  But, I would not change one bit about our family, especially my siblings.  I did not pick my siblings, but I think God did a pretty darn good job at picking them for me.  I believe there are five reasons why our siblings are our best friends… no matter how good or bad the relationship is.

 

  1. They will tell you to snap out of it when most others will definitely not.  When life is not going your way and you continue to let it, your siblings will give you a kick in the butt with the big boot of reality you need to snap out of it.  They do not want to see you struggle and will not allow you to wallow in self-pity.  They do it because they love you.
  2. They will be brutally honest with you. “No, your shoes do not match your handbag.”  “That tie with that shirt?  No way, brother!”  “Your breath stinks; have a TicTac.”  “You have spinach in your teeth.”  And, maybe the most brutal… “I’m concerned about your weight/health.”  Your best friend would never let you walk around with bad fashion, bad breath, or something stuck in your teeth.  Your best friend definitely cares for your health and well-being.  They say all this because they love you.
  3. They have your back no matter what.  When times are tough, when times are good, when people are being kind, when people are being unkind… your siblings have your back.  If you and your sibling had unfriendly words in recent times and someone else is treating your sibling disrespectfully, you will jump in and have their back regardless.  They do it because they love you.
  4. They accept you for being YOU even though you may not sometimes.  It can be hard to look in the mirror and say to yourself, “Yes, this is who I am.”  You may wish you had a different body type.  You may wish you could be more of a morning person.  You may wish you had an outgoing personality and not so introverted.  You may be the person who had a hard time accepting your sexuality earlier in life.  Your siblings accept all of this about you because they love you.
  5. They love you unconditionally.  We all have things we wish we could change or do better.  We have things in our lives that we are proud of.  Life can be difficult, but it can also be absolutely amazing.  Through it all our siblings are our best friends because they love us unconditionally.

I am proud of my siblings.  We each have traits and abilities that make us unique.  All three of us are so incredibly different.  The one thing we all do have in common is we would turn the world inside out to help one another in times of need or trouble.  We would do it because we love each other.

Give a Hug

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Earlier this week I had breakfast at a local “greasy spoon” in town I used to go to in high school.  I’ve known the owner for years and his niece is one of my best friends.  I sat at the counter for breakfast and Cal, the owner, and I chatted for a bit to catch up.  Two New York State Troopers came in and sat at a table and were the only people in that part of the restaurant.  I have been feeling very worried about my friends in law enforcement, fire and EMS with all that has been going on in our country.  I immediately began to worry about these two as well.

When their food came out to be delivered to their table I asked The owner if I could make the delivery.  I brought their breakfast to them, thanked them for what they do every day, for putting their lives on the line for us without fail and said I would include them in my daily prayers for their safety.  I then told them their breakfast was on me.  After arguing back and forth about me buying their breakfast (I know… who argues with a NY State Trooper?),  I was very insistent and won.  Both Troopers were very surprised, became emotional and were very appreciative.  I told them to be safe, have a great day and went back to my seat.

When I sat back down at the breakfast counter I looked at The owner, who is a big, tough looking guy, yet a huge teddy bear, and noticed a tear in the corner of his eye.  He didn’t say a word; he just smiled at me.  I felt my heart smile!  It was an amazing feeling.

I very rarely do something like this.  When I do I never tell anyone about it.  But, with all of the ugliness and hatred we are seeing in our country right now, I feel it necessary to share this story.  But, my purpose is not to receive praise or a pat on the back.  My purpose is to encourage others to combat the hate with kindness.  My purpose is to get people to recognize the power of thanking someone and letting perfect strangers know that what they do on a daily basis does not go unnoticed.  We need to let people in law enforcement, Fire and EMS know their daily commitment to the safety of the people of their communities is seen in their actions and dedication to putting their lives on the line for every one of us.  These brave souls deserve a big, massive collective hug of gratitude from all of us.

*briefly stepping on the soapbox*  I do not know the exact details of the latest police related deaths.  To be very frank, I don’t want to know.  What I do know is when I was pulled over for speeding my hands remained on the steering wheel, I said “Yes, Sir” to the officer, I didn’t reach for anything in any compartments until I was told to, and, even though my handgun was not in the car, I let the officer know I had a concealed carry permit and there was not a gun in my car.  By telling the officer this bit of information it didn’t come as a surprise to him when he pulled my driver’s license information on his computer.  Surprises are not good in this type of situation as they only make someone more anxious than they already are.  I would imagine there is a bit of nervousness or anxiousness already flowing when an officer pulls someone over, especially these days.  If an officer tells me to do something (i.e., “take your hand out of your pocket”) I do it instantly without question or argument.  These actions not only make sure I don’t end up in handcuffs, but they pretty much assure the officer he or she will remain safe and can keep a level and calm head throughout the encounter.  By the way, I do everything I can to make sure that I am not going to be pulled over by the police for any reason.  *stepping off the soapbox*

What I do know is I am tired of people being hateful and ugly toward each other.  I am tired of people blaming others for their lot in life.  I’m tired of senseless deaths because someone got their knickers in a twist and couldn’t come up with a rational, level-headed way to deal with whatever the problem may be.  We have so many things in this world that naturally add to the ugliness we face.  Cancer is one of the biggest culprits.  Although we are trying very hard to find a cure for cancer, right now there isn’t much we can do to end it.  It naturally adds ugliness, grief, sadness, anger, anxiety, uncertainty… Cancer sucks!  But, so do people who believe shooting innocent people will solve the problem. I’m also tired about hearing how certain lives matter.  Last time I checked, God believes you matter and you matter and you matter (insert visual of me pointing at people in a crowd).  Everyone matters. The end!

I recently saw the movie premier of “The Lennon Report”.  This movie brings to light the true events of the tragic night John Lennon was shot at the hands of Mark David Chapman and the events in the emergency room revealing who really treated Lennon that night. In the movie there is mention of John Lennon’s stand against gun violence.  My friend I was with put it best when she said, “This movie has many parallels to what we are dealing with in today’s society.”.  On the 33rd anniversary of Lennon’s death, Yoko Ono tweeted this picture of Lennon’s blood stained glasses,

yoko-ono-guns-lennon-glasses

She added to this picture by stating, “31,537 people are killed by guns in the USA every year. We are turning this beautiful country into war zone.”

See the parallel?  I certainly do.

Back to my original point…

I believe we need to take a step back and figure out why we are so angry; figure out who we are really angry at.  How are we going to effectively and properly handle the anger so no more families have to get the awful visit at their front door telling them their loved one was killed in a senseless act of violence?  The United States of America is becoming the Divided States of America and that causes a gigantic knot in my stomach.  You know, they say everything old becomes new again or everything comes full circle.  It happened with bell-bottom pants… and it’s happened with inequality all over again.  It’s almost like having a lemon of a car.  Just when you think the problem has been fixed… WHAM-OH!  Broken again.

So, with all of this rambling, here is what I am asking of you:

Take a step back and see the whole picture.  Be thankful for what you have in life.  Work hard to obtain what you need.  Hold yourself accountable for what you don’t have and do not blame someone else because you don’t have it.  Strive to have what you desire to have.  Say “Thank you”.  Give someone a hug because we all need a good hug now and then.  And, please, please, please… stop being so ugly to one another.

Love & Hugs to all.